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What
are the support group guidelines?
 The
support group is meant to be a
safe
place
for Jehovah's Witnesses to experience
healing.
To attain our goal of a safe environment for
all, we ask each attender to commit to follow
these group guidelines.
Group
members will allow the support group to be a
safe place by:
 Keeping
confidential
what is said at meetings and who attends. This
is critical for those who have family and loved
ones still in the Watchtower Organization.
 As
group facilitators we are morally and ethically
obligated to break confidentiality when a member
communicates an intention to kill themself; a
member communicates an intention to harm another
person; or a member reveals ongoing sexual or
physical abuse.
 Allowing
everyone to take ownership of their own
feelings,
attitudes and
behaviors.
Not everyone shares the same feelings however
everyone is allowed to have their own opinions
and feelings without rebuke from others in the
group.
Allowing
everyone
time to talk.
Those who are more talkative need to allow the
quieter members time to share their views. At
times the more sensitive members may need
encouragement to share their
feelings.
Restricting
vulgarity
or condenscending
behavior.
As facilitators we are responsible to ask anyone
that comes into the group intending to cause
disruption and discord to leave the
group.
Asking
permission
before entering another person's
space.
Some members may have experienced abuse and may
not appreciate another person touching them.
Others need the freedom to just listen and
experience the group and should not be bombarded
with personal questions. Please be sensitive to
others by giving
them your phone
number
instead of asking for theirs. This allows them
to call you when they feel
comfortable.
Remembering
that laughter
is healing.
When the group finds humour in the stories or
someone's comments, they are not laughing at you
or your situation. They are experiencing
healing.
For
Christians
who come to the group to learn about Jehovah's
Witnesses we need them to have a loving attitude
and a listening ear to former Witnesses when
they need to share.
The
healing
process takes precedence over
learning.
 Children
who are actively participating in the support
group are welcome to attend. If you are unable
to find a sitter please call in advance of the
meeting and we will see if we can find someone
outside the place of meeting to look after the
younger children.
Why
do former Jehovah's Witnesses need
support?
Jehovah's
Witnesses who come out of the Watchtower
organization do so usually with a great deal of
"baggage". Some of the issues that former
Jehovah's Witnesses need to deal with
are:
 The
pain of losing family and friends.
The
feeling of isolation. When one is cut off from
their family and friends in the organization
(often this has been their only association)
there seems to be no one who understands. When
the former Witness does try to share with the
outside world they may be told to just get over
it. It is not unusual to feel that they are the
only ones going through these
feelings.
Years
of indoctrination. The Society has taught their
followers to be prejudiced against the world
outside the Watchtower especially those who call
themselves Christians. When the Witness leave
the "safety" of the organization it can often be
an unsettling experience and a fearful
time.
Fear
of Churches. It may be difficult to even enter a
church as Jehovah's Witnesses have been taught
that this is Satan's territory.
Feeling
of failure. Often Jehovah's Witnesses feel that
they have failed God because they were not able
to stay in "God's organization". Outside the
Watchtower they can feel as though God no longer
loves them and has totally abandoned
them.
Anger
against the organization and/or God
himself.
Inability
to make decisions or the desire to find another
"high control" group to replace the controlled
life in the Watchtower.
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Who
should join a support group?
Any
former Jehovah's Witness whether an inactive
Witness, disassociated, or disfellowshipped is
encouraged to attend. As well, any Jehovah's
Witness who is questioning the Watchtower
Society may attend.
In
many support groups, Christians who are willing
to support former Witnesses in their journey out
of the of the Watchtower are also
welcome.
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How
do I start a support group?
Support
groups offer the opportunity for people to meet
and share information about their experiences
with cult involvement. It is a place where one
can speak freely about their feelings, and know
that others, no doubt, have had the same
feelings at some point in time. Support groups
provide a means of relating strategies for
recovering from the cult experience and
understanding how you got recruited. Here are
some specific things to do to begin a support
group:
 Choose
a location:
homes, meeting rooms, civic centers,
etc.
 Advertise:
post notices at the library, churches, barber
shops, beauty shops and newspapers. Word of
mouth is also beneficial. Sign guestbooks on
websites.
Choose
topics:
at your first meeting, have a brain-storming
session to think of possible topics or use this
time to get to know each other and share your
story.
Choose
meeting frequency:
at the first meeting you should decide how often
the group will meet. If it is a large group, you
might want to set up a buddy system where
willing participants include their names and
phone numbers on a list to be circulated at the
meetings.
Plan
your meeting: the
content of your meetings is up to you and your
group members. If you subscribe to a ex-cult
newsletter, information in it may be shared.
Sometimes Bible study could be included, or
information obtained from the internet. Handouts
could be made available or you may prefer a
simple group discussion. A guest speaker may be
invited. Keep it simple and uplifting and avoid
an all-out gripe session. Everyone has had a
negative cult experience, but it is more
important to relay what has
helped
rather than dwell on the negatives.
You
are making a wonderful commitment to yourself
and the people you will soon be helping! The
whole point of a support group is to educate
ourselves and others about cults and find
positive ways of learning to deal with this
negative experience. May God bless
you.
Contributed
by CEPA Inc
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